You would think after having cancer and beating it's ass that there would be nothing to worry about... oh how i wish that was the case... You would think that after being in remission for 11 years that going for your yearly check up would not make you worry.. but there is that constant thought in the back of your mind WHAT IF... that is what i am dealing with right now... Monday March 17th, the day before my 23 birthday and on St. Patricks day i go in for my check up... I have not been in 2 years b\c i was sooo busy with school and traveling with the teams that i didnt have time to... (Preston, please dont tell ur mom i dont need her to yell at me like she did caryn lol) Yeah i know i should have made time but with the schedule the docs have it just could not happen.. i feeel fine but these past couple of weeks since i have made the appt i have been stressing out... and no one around me really understands what going really means... it's spending a whole day at Emory, have Ct scans done, bone scans done, echo's, ekg's, and loads of bllod work.. dont get me wrong i love having the tests done except the CT scan cause of having to drink the contrast... and not being able to eat.. but otherwise i am fine... but then having to see all 8 docs i just get overwhelmed and such... and then when the test come back normal i slap myself for getting all worked up over nothing... but then you get the test back that a a lil abnormal and you stress out even more.... idk..

I just needed to vent to ppl who understand how complex a doctors visit can be... lol no one else gets why i get so nervous, i shut down and just need to have me time even more when the doctor visits comes around...

I will post when i hear something back from the docs.... havea great rest of the week and a WONDERFUL weekend...

Hey P~ we still on for drinks and dinner on Monday 17th, st. patricks day???

This is a main reason i have a smile on my face when at times all i want to do is CRY~!! My strength...